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Wednesday, September 8, 2010

We Fall Down...


That is ... Fall into this season's writing contests.  Even if you're not a writer, I'm sure September 1, opens a door of new possibilities for you.  It almost feels like January 1, when we get to start again.  We fall down, but get back up again.  

And there's the other side of it.  


Summer is emotionally and officially over after Labor Day weekend.  I'm both sad and excited. The sadness comes from not being able to watch the sunset on a Hawaii beach before dinner, unless I create a mural of it on my living room wall.  

My excitement centers on my book submission and entering the Scriptapalooza Television Writing Contest.  Of course, I'll probably be kissing that deadline date. Here are my contenders for entry:

(The Middle)

 (House of Payne)

(Army Wives)

1. The Middle
2. Tyler Perry's House of Payne
3 Army Wives



I'm leaning toward The Middle because the Mom, Frankie Heck, doesn't get anymore Average Joan than her.  I love the plot premise: 

The daily mishaps of a harried woman and her semi-dysfunctional family and their attempts to survive life in general in the city of Orson, Indiana.  What Average Jane do you know isn't harried?  As long as there are families, computers, shopping malls and double coupons -- our lives will be harried.  Thank goodness for chocolate.   I'm just saying.

 (Super Mom)

Patricia Heaton's Frankie Heck is the "every woman," at least in the land of Average Joans.  And her husband Mike is the husband many of us have but won't admit it unless we're strapped to a lie detector.  I won't tell if you won't.  But at the end, these "every men" always come through in a pinch.

(Everybody Loves Raymond)

Frankie makes Debra Barone look like arm-candy taking her to the next hilarious level.  She basically accepts her family for who they are ... the good, but mostly the ugly.  She fights it, but she often have bouts of "Keeping up with the Joneses ..." okay, staying in their shadow.  Why can't her daughter, Sue, take a great class photo?  Just once could she not reach the re-take limit of three.  And why can't she get into a school club?  Even being Safety Girl's reaching high.

Frankie wonders that maybe she's taking this acceptance thing too far.  Maybe she should push her children more.  Shall I dare say it.  Why must they always be average?  (I'm speaking from her perspective, of course.  She's just having a moment.  It doesn't take her long to realize that in all of us Average Joans, something extraordinary always lurks beneath the surface.  It emerges when we least expect it. 

(Brick)

Brick, her baby son, is brilliant but weird in a social misfit at 8 kind of way.  (Average doesn't mean you have less intelligence.) Sixteen-year-old Axl gives new meaning to the word slacker.  He spends more time in his boxers than in his books.  I love Sue the middle child.  No matter how many clubs she don't get into; no matter how many photos of her come out awful, and how many things she just can't do -- she shrugs it off and tries something new.  That alone is extraordinary. 


In our super-sized world of super babies who read by two, this simply does not compute to the over-achiever.  That's why The Middle is my choice of entry.  

(Frankie)
Sure, Frankie has Sue tendencies at her job selling cars.  It's not her forte, but she's going to sell a car by hook or crook.  Even if her youngest can't attend school because he's sick, and she has to stow him in the back seat of a car on the lot in his pajamas with his pillow and blankie.  Don't judge.


My fave episode ... "Average Rules."   No surprise there.  Here's the recap.  Go to ABC.com and check it out.  It's hilarious! 

After attending year-end school parent-teacher conferences, Frankie and Mike are shocked to discover that Brick may be held back from going to the third grade because the school librarian, Mrs. Nethercott, has it out for him due to 31 unreturned books. Meanwhile, as Axl's aptitude test results reveal him to be academically gifted, Frankie makes it her mission to get an overlooked Sue the recognition she deserves when none of her teachers even remember that she's in their classes.

(Sue Heck)
Even though it's the last week of school, the coach allows Sue (due to Mom's incessant begging)to be included in the closing year's track team if she's able to run a certain amount of laps around the track.  Sue trains so hard she injures her leg and ends up with crutches.  Did you just say another chance bites the dust?   Oh, not so.  This is when the extraordinary part shows whose in charge.  

She hops with her crutches determined to make the team.  Torrential rain doesn't stop her, a hit in the head by a flying object doesn't stop her, her crutch breaks ... she keeps on crawling until she crosses the finish line to a standing ovation.  That's my girl!

Oh yeah, Scriptapalooza TV- International Television Writing Contest ... Joan B. Average is heading your way.   

Here are my top picks for upcoming scriptwriting contests from moviebytes.com:

Scriptapalooza TV Writing Competition 
Final Deadline: 10/01/2010 
Entry Fee:  $40
Our intention is to help open doors for the aspiring television writer. There are four categories you can submit to, which include 1 hour existing spec scripts, 1/2 hour existing sitcom spec scripts, original pilots, and reality programs. This competition is designed with the TV writer and crossover screenwriter in mind. The participants we have chosen to read the winning scripts are individuals from established production companies. 
Overall rating:

3.5 stars3.5 stars3.5 stars3.5 stars

The Greenlight.com Annual Script Contest
Entry Fee:  $50
Final Deadline: 09/30/2010
Our Objective is to provide new writers with feedback, exposure and cool prizes they can show their friends. Our mission at the-GreenLight.com is to provide new writers with helpful insight and tools to make their writing better. Overall rating:
5 stars5 stars5 stars5 stars5 stars

Acclaim Film
Final Deadline: 10/23/2010 
Entry Fee:  $55
To introduce writers to the decision makers in film and multimedia markets. Top script receives $1,000 and ALL competition winners, runners-up, and finalists will earn the chance to have their scripts read by established production companies and agents in LA and NY. We strive to provide commentary on each script.  
Overall rating:
4 stars4 stars4 stars4 stars

Acclaim TV Screenwriting Competition
Final Deadline: 10/23/2010 
Entry Fee:  $50
To introduce writers to the decision makers of traditional broadcast television, the cable market, and multi-media outlets. Competition winners will have their material read by experienced producers and agents in L.A. and N.Y.  
Overall rating:
3.5 stars3.5 stars3.5 stars3.5 stars

LA Comedy Scripts Screenplay Competition
Final Deadline: 12/20/2010
Entry Fee:
$35 features/$30 shorts/$30 Half-hour Comedy pilots (by October 2nd, 2010); $45 features/$40 shorts/$40 Half-hour Comedy Pilots (by November 3rd, 2010); $55 features/$50 shorts/$50 Half-hour Comedy Pilots (by December 3rd, 2010); $75 features/$70 shorts/$70 Half-hour Comedy Pilots (by December 20th, 2010

The L.A. Comedy Shorts Film Festival and Screenplay Competition is dedicated to promoting the comedy genre and helping comedy filmmakers and writers take the next step in their careers. L.A. Comedy Shorts was ranked one of the ''Top 25 Festivals Worth the Entry Fee'' by MovieMaker Magazine, and listed as one of the ''Top Ten Festivals in the U.  
Overall rating: 4 stars4 stars4 stars4 stars

Monday, August 30, 2010

Is Your Life a Reality Show?

 (WE's Bridezillas)

(Kate Plus Eight - TLC.com)
(Big Brother 12)

(Project Runway) 

Can't you see it now?  There I am ... Joan B. Average, Scriptwriter, an animated version  of me on your screen after you clicked on TLC or E!  

There I am... an animated me being chased by my laptop.  It smacks me on the head and instead of seeing stars, benjamines whirl around my head.  It turns into one bill that I'm chasing and following it to my laptop and superimposes into a live me hard at work at my desk.  

Then what?  Does the camera follow me knitting in that long post office line because my local federal employees are a tad slow.  Or maybe you can get an attractive glimpse of me plunging the crap out of my kitchen drain so I can finish washing my dishes ... sorry, no dishwasher here.  Very attractive.   

Why not join me on my mini trampoline while I'm watching Food Network and wishing I was eating Bobby Flay's latest throw-down cuisine ... chocolate bread pudding ... yummo!

It doesn't take long for you to realize that reality shows are like watching yourself living your life ... BORING.

Here's the million dollar question.  If reality shows are so boring why can't we stop watching them?  We can put it to the potato chip philosophy.  You know it's salty and fattening but can't stop at one. 

Another course of thought, let's escape our lives and solve somebody else's problems. We can fix what's wrong in another person's life all within a commercial break.

Not so fast, let's first distinguish between the boring and the glued to the screen reality show.  Often the ones that follow the daily lives of people can put you in yawn mode real quick.  But those where contestants are competing for their dreams keep you tuning into the time slot.





(Lisa Raye)

Let's see, we have the Lisa Raye reality show, the Terrell Owens reality show, the Fantasia reality show and the list goes on and on like popcorn.  

Then you have the dream job reality show I mentioned, the life with sextuplets and twins reality, the 19 kids and counting sprinkled between the little people shows I love.  The latter are the most inspiring.  TLC launched December 15, 2009 the "Little Chocolatiers" featuring Steve Hatch and Katie Masterson, the husband and wife team behind Salt Lake City's Hatch Family Chocolates.


(TLC's Little Chocolatiers)


 What if reality shows were produced in the fifties?  Can you picture Lucy and Ricky Ricardo in their Hollywood mansion arguing about leaving the seat up, or leaving the gas tank on "E" ... yada, yada.  

Life can be messy, fun, difficult, wonderful, sad and miraculous all in a five-minute time span.  And we get to see it everyday in high definition.  

From Bridezillas to Hoarders:  Buried Alive ... reality shows are also a cry for help. If we look at them closely, we may see pieces of ourselves that make us cringe.  We don't have to live a depressed, joyless life.  You are what you think.  You think negative thoughts your life becomes consumed with negativity.

It's amazing how quick the designers on Heidi Klum's Project Runway are to criticize each other.  Very rarely is there something positive said.

Then there are those reality television shows that are inspiring and end each episode on a positive note with a valid lesson learn.  Run's House comes to mind.  Run's house follows the hectic life of  Reverend Run aka Joseph Simmons aka Rapper Run DMC, hip-hop music pioneer and his wife and seven talented children.

(Run's House)

Run's House stands apart from the other MTV reality show programming.   This show portrays one affluent African-American family's values and morals. Unlike many MTV shows, there is no sex, profanity, foul language, or violence to worry about.

 (Dog:  The Bounty Hunter)

A&E won't be left out of the reality show drama.  They're pulling in the ratings with "Dog:  The Bounty Hunter."  Surprisingly this show has a moral and spiritual spin to it.  They often have prayer with bail jumper right after they slap on the handcuffs, and always end with words of encouragement to help them change their lives.  Unlike Run's there's also a lot of bleeping out profanity.

Reality shows can be a wake-up call in our own lives and a seed for change. 

  

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Summer Reality Shows are Back!



Girl Enjoying a Georgia Peach



Cherries

Peaches, Watermelon, Bing Cherries ... 
and the upcoming "Big Brother"
... the new signs of Summer heat up Network and Cable Television. 


(Big Brother 11)
 
It wouldn't be summer without "Big Brother."  Despite my love/no love relationship with this reality show, I always catch myself scheduling my nights around an airing of "Big Brother" from early July to mid-September.

Once again, we'll see the standard Jeff and Jordan romances, cat fights between Lydia and Natalie clones over a Jessie stud wannabe, scheming alliances like Kevin and Natalie's and explosive rebellions that forced "Big Brother 11" producers to send Chima packing without a nomination ceremony.  

(Television Viewer)

No matter how much I try not to watch, I'm surrounded by close friends and family members who will phone me during the time slot and ask:  Are you watching "Big Brother?"  And of course my answer is always:  Oh, yeah ... did you see what so and so just did?



Sunset Palms

It gets worse.  On a long weekend vacation, I rush back from a sunset walk on the beach just to watch the 12 insane house guests who by now have turned into preschoolers.  (no offense to preschoolers)


It would be nice to see some seasoned and ethnically diverse "Big Brother 12" housemates or any not obsessed with their looks and born before the Internet. 


(True Beauty)

Speaking of beauty obsession, a newcomer on the reality show summer scene and in its second season is the ABC show, "True Beauty" -- where shallow, beauty-obsessed young men and women are lured into thinking they're competing to become (this season) Mr. or Ms. Las Vegas and all the fame and fortune that come with it. 


  (Candid Camera)


What they don't know is that they're really being judged on their inner beauty -- physical beauty plays second fiddle.  On the first challenge, they create a hot look for themselves on a limited budget.  Hidden cameras follow them 24-7 through challenges and through their personal time.

It almost reminds me of the old "Candid Camera" Show.  Hmm ... what would Allen Funt think about, "True Beauty?"  I'm thinking he would've dug it.

An actress who pretends to be the store's sales person helps each contestant create an eye-catching look.  She tempts them into stealing an outfit that's over their budget, as the three "True Beauty" judges and America candidly watch.  Some pass the test and, sad to say, some don't.

I missed the show last night, but I wouldn't raise an eyebrow if the young woman who flunked the first test and the second test last week was shown the door.



 (The Next Food Network Star)


Then we head over to the food and interior design side of reality television where our bullies are not fellow contestants, but appear to be the judges of "The Next Food Network Star" and "HGTV Design Star."  

Their job is to bring out the best in each finalist where ultimately one will win a cooking show on the Food Network.  If they can't stand a little constructive bullying, then they need to get out of the kitchen.  Whether they're cooking in it or hanging cabinets.


 (HGTV Design Star 2010)

Yes, summer and reality television heat will both sizzle in the upcoming weeks.  Stay in either one too long, you may get fried.  So what's a summer viewer to do?   You slather on extra sun block, crank up the A.C. and go back for more.  Ah ... don't you just love summertime drama?


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